By the Numbers: Thursday Afternoon Faculty Meeting

Number of emails we got from the principal telling us the meeting would be held in the choir room: 1

Number of announcements the principal made over the intercom telling us the meeting would be held in the library: 1

Number of Thursday afternoon faculty meetings held in the library: 0

Approximate number of minutes we were told this meeting would last: 15

Actual number of minutes spent in faculty meeting: 51

Number of football coaches present at meeting: 0

Number of receipts passed around, because nobody could read the signature of the person who turned it in to the bookkeeper: 1

Number of people who confessed to being the bad hand-writer: 0

Number of gang symbols pointed out to us by the school resource officer: 43

Number of gang symbols well-known to and memorized by our student body: 32053957

Number of state capitals well-known to and memorized by our student body: 0

Number of minutes spent discussing dress code during meeting: 45

Number of questions about dress code asked at meeting: 475

Number of questions about dress code that had already been addressed during in-service: 229

Number of questions about dress code that could have been answered with a simple READING OF THE PUBLISHED DRESS CODE IN THE SCHOOL HANDBOOK: 220

Number of teachers who asked, "Can you define how big is TOO big for a belt buckle?": 1

Number of teachers who asked, "Can you make an announcement to tell the kids that 'No sunglasses' means they can't wear them on TOP of their heads either?": 1

Number of teachers who asked, "What if they have those glasses that get darker in the sun?": 1

Number of teachers who asked, "What about grillz?": 1

Number of teachers who asked their neighbors, "What are grillz?": 74

Number of times I giggled when old white people said the word "grillz": 74

Number of times I rolled my eyes during meeting: 2,592,674

Number of times I checked my watch in a five minute period: 48

Number of minutes it took to get to my car when dismissed: 0.6