More Lefty Discrimination

Have you seen this story?

Left-handed women may have a shorter life-span

What I particularly like about this story is that its results are inconclusive, BUT THEY PUBLISHED IT ANYWAY.

"Left-handers are reported to be underrepresented in the older age groups, although such findings are still much debated," write Dr. Made K. Ramadhani and colleagues from University Medical Center Utrecht.
Could this be because, in their youth, they were forced to write with their right hands? We are not so far out of a period when left-handedness was considered (among other things) a sign of retardation, a symptom of criminal behavior, and a link to the devil; if their mamas didn't make them change, their teachers did.

Among 12,178 middle-aged Dutch women the researchers followed for nearly 13 years, 252 died.
(you know it is serious business when I am forced to pull out the math) So let's see ... during a thirteen year timespan, two percent of the participants died. So what we have here is a group of SCIENTISTS basing a fairly damaging and, I would say, discriminatory, hypothesis on LESS THAN TWO PERCENT of its overall participancy.

The underlying mechanisms remain elusive, although genetics and environmental factors may be involved, Ramadhani and colleagues suggest.

Really? Other factors may have caused their deaths? So maybe it wasn't their handedness that caused them to DIE OF BREAST CANCER?

The author of a commentary, Dr. Olga Basso, who is left-handed, is highly skeptical, in general, of research relating disease and death with handedness. ... adds Basso, "I doubt that my left hand is prematurely pulling me toward my grave."

Let me make clear that if I have a shorter lifespan, it will be because I have finally up and murdered one of these doctors and was then lethally injected. NOT because of my left-handedness.
(also, NOT that I would get caught, do something like that)