Sock It To Me!*

I have to keep my hands busy when I'm watching movies or reading; otherwise, I can't concentrate and there's a tragic ADD incident. Like the time I broke my mom's lampshade when I was reading The Scarlet Letter; don't ask. After that, she made me these beanbags and for a while there she'd see me with a book and she'd be all, "Where are your beanbags? What do you think you're doing?"

Anyway, in the interest of keeping my own lampshades undisturbed during my movie marathon, I made these:


I realize the picture quality is not awesome, but these slippers totally are. They are purple, which ups their Awesome Quotient right there, plus I made them my very own self. Thanks to my camera, you cannot tell that I am very very bad at sewing seams.







My only concern is that the slippers don't hold their shape
when I take them off, and actually take the form of ... uh ... something sort of reminiscent of a [whisper] phallus. So when I take them off I immediately roll them into a ball, because: what if I die in my sleep? And then the police come in and strangely-shaped knitted object on the floor--wait. TWO strangely-shaped knitted objects. Actually, I don't even want to think about it; thus, the hurried rolling of the Penis Socks.









*Okay, that is a lame title, but you should be glad that I didn't incorporate the word booty, because I totally could have.